My kiddo had a sleepover at Grandma's house on Friday night.  I did my usual nightly activities when B has a sleepover & woke up on Saturday morning planning to clean my house.  

I was listening to music & getting ready for the day when a thought popped in my head:  'I should go watch the sunrise from the lake'!  I quickly looked up the sunrise time & decided I could make it to the lake in time.  I was seriously cutting it close but I made it!  

I debated on even going in the first place.  Then I asked myself 'When this all ends am I going to miss cleaning my house or miss seeing the sunrise from the lake?'.  The sunrise obviously won.

I live my life a lot differently now.  When I saw firsthand how short life can truly be, it permanently changed my perspective.  I try to see the best in every situation.  I let a lot of things go.  I don't hold on so tightly anymore to situations that aren't serving my happiness.

I got this message on the back of a Splenda packet when I was making my tea the other morning.  I thought it was fitting for the situation I'm in.

Coincidentally, I got the same message yesterday morning from a Splenda packet when I was making tea at my mom's house.

I know it's just a cute phrase to put on a sugar substitute packet but it has been my motto for life lately.

If this year has taught me anything, it is that you never know when this life will be over.  

My mom & I were talking the other day about how some people's lives are cut short.  How some people don't have enough time on this earth.  I thought about it for a minute & realized that even if I live to be 100, it probably still won't be enough time for me.  We're all in a race against time & it will never be enough.

Using journaling to discover who I am.

After James died I noticed I was starting to fall back into the old habits I had before we got married...

I make them sound bad but I'm fairly wholesome so they're totally not!  Here are a few examples:

- I binge watched the entire series of The Golden Girls.  I used to watch the girls all the time after I got done working my first job out of high school.

- I started drinking soda again.  I used to drink pop at an alarming rate but gave up on it over the past few years.  Now I love to have a little can of Pepsi or Mountain Dew on my kid free nights.

- And, after watching one too many Tik Toks about the benefits of writing things down, I started journaling again.

I don't think I ever talked about this on my blog before but I used to keep some epic journals during my senior year & just out of high school.  I put a ton of random things in them & also wrote what I hoped for the future.  It all kind of stopped after I met James because I was actually living a good life.  I didn't need to dream about anything bigger.

Today is James's birthday.  Now it is just a date on the calendar.  There will be no more birthday cakes & celebrations with James here with us.  No one will get to see him grow older.

James will be 38 years old forever.

James had very few pictures from his childhood but we noticed a theme with most of them:  James was always in front of a cake!  It became a joke in our family every time James got around a cake.  The picture to the left is from his 38th birthday.  We always do birthday celebrations with our immediate family & I'm now so thankful for it.

My mom suggested getting a cake for James's birthday this year.  It's bittersweet but we still wanted to remember his birthday.

If I had only known his 38th birthday would have been his last.  But you don't know what you don't know.  I didn't know James would be gone just 9 months later. I didn't know I would be alone & crying on his birthday instead of celebrating.

Hey there, Besties! 🌟

Welcome to the most exciting time of the year - Seed Starting Month! Now, you might have heard the age-old gardening mantra suggesting to start seeds 6-8 weeks before the last frost. But, in true Tiff fashion, impatience is the name of the game, and I'm diving in headfirst to get my green babies started a tad early – we're talking 12-13 weeks early! Sure, it's a bit more of a juggle to keep those tiny seedlings thriving, but isn't there something magical about nurturing life from the very beginning?

Drawing inspiration from my dear dad, the original green thumb in the family, I'm embracing the seed starting season with all the zest it deserves. Last year, Dad beat me to the punch, embarking on his planting journey a few weeks before I did. And this year? He's already nudging me about getting those peppers started – those slow pokes really do take their sweet time! Little did he know that my pepper seed stash was ready to go in January. Oh, I'm all in on this assignment!

Every year, I promise myself to keep it simple, yet somehow end up surrounded by a lush jungle of pepper and tomato plants. So, a little shoutout to my local Besties – if you're in the mood to adopt some plant babies, hit me up!

In the spirit of fresh starts and healing, I'm channeling the power of gardening this season. The folks at Mind & Soil have really opened my eyes to the mental health wonders of getting your hands dirty and connecting with Earth. Gardening has always been my sanctuary, but it's my lifeline this year, offering a slice of purpose as I tend to my budding garden.

Speaking of getting things rolling, my mission this week is to whip my basement growing area into shape. Armed with peat pellets, a shiny new reusable seed starting tray (because, sustainability), and a heart full of hope, I'm ready to embark on this journey of growth and discovery.

Reflecting on last year's seed-starting saga, I'm reminded of the playful rivalry between my dad's earthy approach and my peat pellet preference. With the clock ticking towards planting season, it's game on, Dad – let's see who gets their garden groove on first this year!

For all my fellow plant enthusiasts out there, I'm dying to hear about your seed-starting stories. When do you plant your seeds? What's on your growing list this year? Let's share our plans, dreams, and maybe even a few gardening mishaps because isn't that what Earth School is all about?

Catch you on the flip side, Besties, and happy gardening! 🌱✨