Today marks 10 years of homeownership for me, a full decade since we bought this little foreclosure and turned it into a home. Typically, an anniversary like this would feel purely exciting or nostalgic. But if you’ve ever navigated grief, you know that big milestones come with layers.

This post isn’t just about celebrating a homeownership anniversary.

It’s about how grief changes every milestone, even the ones that should feel joyful.

The Day That Was Supposed to Feel Happy… But Didn’t

When we bought this house ten years ago, life looked completely different. My husband, James, and I were renovating side by side, dreaming up the family and future we were building within these walls. We had no idea what was coming.

After losing James to metastatic melanoma, this house became something else.

A reminder. A refuge. A trigger. A timeline all on its own.

And that’s the part people don’t talk about enough:

✨ Grief doesn’t stay in the past. It follows you into every holiday, every celebration, every “should-be-happy” moment, even your homeownership anniversary.

How Grief Changes Your Relationship With Home

Homes hold memories, and mine holds an entire lifetime:

• The days we spent tearing out floors
• The late-night renovation planning
• The laughter
• The stress
• The dreams we were building
• And the life we never got to fully live together

When you lose the person you built your life with, even the good milestones are cast in shadow. It’s not because you’re ungrateful; it’s because the person who should be here to celebrate with you is missing.

I’m proud of everything this house has been for me and my son.

But I’d be lying if I said today didn’t also sting.

Holding Pride and Pain at the Same Time

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned in my widowhood journey is that two things can be true:

✨ I’m grateful for this house.

✨ I’m still grieving the life we imagined inside it.

That is the reality of healing after loss.

It’s not linear, and it doesn’t follow a neat timeline. Even when you’ve rebuilt so much of your life, certain anniversaries will always hit differently.

This House Became the Story of My After

In the ten years I’ve lived here, this house has held:

• My strongest memories of James
• The early days of becoming a foster and adoptive mom
• Nights when grief swallowed the room
• The slow rebuilding of my identity
• New routines, new dreams, new chapters
• And the woman I’m becoming now

This home has seen every version of me: the wife, the widow, the mom, the renovator, the survivor, the one still learning how to move forward.

If You’re Grieving Through a Milestone Too

I want you to know this:

You’re not doing it wrong.

You’re not ungrateful.

You’re not “stuck.”

You’re simply human.

Grief doesn’t ruin milestones. It reshapes them.

It teaches us to feel everything fully, even when feelings contradict each other. It reminds us that love doesn’t end just because life has changed.

Ten Years Later

So yes… today is the 10th anniversary of owning my home.

And yes… It’s both beautiful and heavy.

I’m celebrating what I’ve survived.

I’m honoring the life that was.

This house holds it all: the joy, the loss, the rebuilding, the growth. And maybe that’s the real story of homeownership that no one talks about:

It’s not just about owning a home.

It’s about everything life hands you inside it.

If you've ever wandered outside with big "I'm gonna fix everything today" energy only to stare at your yard like it's an emotional crime scene... hi, welcome. You're in the right place.

As someone with a squirrel brain and the patience of a wet cat, I LOVE seeing things get done quickly. Like instant gratification or 'I don't want it' levels of urgency. But being a widow? Oh, she had other plans.

The Before Times: Teamwork Makes the Dream Work

When James was still here, our house projects were tag-team magic. He handled the heavy lifting, and I handled the perfectionism. We were the DIY power couple; emotionally attached to our toolbox and suspiciously invested in which mulch color was "right for our vibe."

But when you suddenly go from "we" to "me"? It hits different. And by "hits," I mean it feels like the to-do list got longer while your emotional bandwidth got shorter.

The Brutal Truth: It's ALL You Now

Hey there, Besties! 🌟

Today, I'm taking a little trip down memory lane. Remember when I was super picky about paint brands? Yep, I was quite the paint snob. But guess what? Things have changed! While I admit some paint is better than others, I've realized that nobody will notice if I use $1 acrylic paint for projects like painting a picture frame. Let's dive into why sometimes any paint will do!

The Early Days

In the beginning, when I first ventured into refurbishing furniture, my go-to was Annie Sloan Chalk Paint, arguably the best chalk paint available. However, its limited availability meant driving over 30 miles just to pick up a can—talk about commitment!

I also fell hard for Fusion Mineral Paint, which I still adore due to its built-in topcoat—perfect for someone like me who struggles with finishing touches. Yes, I once drove an hour each way just to get my hands on this paint!

Choosing the Right Paint

Choosing the right paint can indeed make a difference, especially for specific projects. Specialty paints like Fusion Mineral or Annie Sloan offer unique advantages, such as easier application and better durability for furniture. However, they have limitations, such as higher costs and fewer color options.

The Industry Secret

Before the trend of specialized "cabinet paints," many DIY enthusiasts and professionals simply used regular latex wall paint for cabinets—and it worked just fine! This shows that specialty paints offer certain benefits but are not always necessary.

Pros & Cons of Specialty Paint:

Pros:

- Specialty paints often come with additives like built-in sealers or primers.

- They can save time and effort in the prep and finishing stages.

- Often better for specific surfaces or uses, offering more durability.

Cons:

- Higher cost.

- Limited color choices and availability.

- It can be overkill for simple or small projects.

Conclusion

Being open to experimenting with different types of paint has taught me that flexibility can lead to creativity and unexpected success. Whether you're touching up an old picture frame or tackling a full furniture refurbishment, the right paint might just be the one you already have at hand. Life's too short to sweat the small stuff—embrace the unexpected, and sometimes, the less expensive options lead to the best outcomes!

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Hey there, Besties! 🌟

As we dive back into our journey together, I'm thrilled to share a transformative approach that's reshaping how I connect with you all—welcome to the era of unbranding on On the Creek!

What's the Big Deal About Branding?

In the world of blogging and social media, branding is seen as the golden rule. The idea is simple: find a niche, pick a consistent theme, and stick with it. This could be anything from a specific color palette to a particular writing style or a focused topic like home improvement or thrifting. The goal? To create a recognizable identity that attracts and retains a loyal audience who knows exactly what to expect.

Why Branding Has Been King

Branding helps to establish credibility and authority. It makes a blog or social media profile instantly recognizable, which is crucial in a sea of endless online content. For a blogger, a strong, consistent brand can be the difference between being a memorable voice in a niche community and just another webpage.

But Here's the Twist...

While branding can be powerful, it can also be restrictive. It can box creators into a single dimension, limiting the exploration of diverse interests and the natural evolution of personal or creative growth. This is where unbranding comes into play, offering a breath of fresh air for those of us who thrive on change and variety.

What is Unbranding?

Unbranding is about stepping away from the rigid confines of traditional branding. It's a dynamic approach where flexibility and spontaneity lead the way, allowing me to explore many themes and styles without being tethered to a specific brand identity. Each collection of posts on my Instagram will be a new adventure, showcasing varying designs, themes, and stories that reflect the changing tides of my creative passions.

Why Choose Unbranding?

This journey is inspired by life itself—unpredictable, ever-evolving, and rich with new inspirations daily. Just as we evolve, so should our creative expressions. Whether it's a newfound love for a bold font, a sudden shift to minimalist aesthetics, or a deep dive into rustic home decor, unbranding allows these passions to surface naturally and authentically in our shared space.

The Beauty of Creative Freedom

By embracing unbranding, I'm not just changing the layout of my posts or the style of my visuals. I'm adopting a philosophy that celebrates growth and change. It's about letting each series of posts reflect where I'm at that moment—be it revamping a corner of our home, uncovering gems at local thrift stores, or turning our garden into a haven of tranquility.

Join Our Unbranded Journey

I invite you to join me on this unbranded path as we throw the conventional playbook out the window and let our creative spirits soar freely. With each post, we'll explore different facets of our lives and interests while staying true to the heart of our journey together.

Stay tuned for what promises to be a captivating mix of stories, tips, and inspirations that will keep you coming back for more. Let's make our blog a testament to the beauty of change and the endless possibilities that come with embracing our true selves.